My Story

Today I'm grateful for the opportunity to write my own story and for the ability to change the ending. My story can end any way I want it to. 

Yesterday a friend asked me if I would write my story down- if I wouldn't mind sharing my journey with others even if it isn't in detail. I told her I'd think on it. I need to get to a point that I can get past the hurt of it all and be able to resist the criticism that is sure to follow. Then as I began thinking.. I thought how wonderful is it that I can make my story end any way I want it to ? That's pretty amazing if you ask me :-)  I'm so grateful for my agency to do it with. 

The Atonement

Today I'm so grateful for other bloggers, and their posts which inspire me to be better.

Today I'm especially grateful for the Atonement and for the sacrafice my savior has made for me.  Okay so I have so many thoughts I want to share about this so... here it goes.. bring on the bullet points:

• Sunday we had a very different sacrament meeting in my church services.  It was completely based on music and the spirit that Hymns can bring.  I remember singing this song: and I looked up at my bishop (a man that I've come to love and respect through the last two years- I'm actually really sad to leave my ward because of the things he's helped me with) Anyway, So I totally looked up at him and this sweet man totally was trying fighting back the tears.  I admire men who aren't afraid to show emotions.  It totally touched my heart and I could see how much the atonement truly meant to him.  
• This blog reminded me of a video that I watched so long ago that I forgot about (until now).  I am so grateful for her comments on it.  Here's the video:

 

• Okay, so I'm not sure if I mentioned this before and I really don't care if I have, this blog is more for me anyway, but I'm a recovering addict.  I made some major mistakes in my life and I'm trying to turn my life around which includes turning more to my Savior and not to my addictions.  The atonement means so much in my life- it has changed who I am.  It has changed my outlook on life.  It has changed me so so much- it's the one thing that kept me going when it got so hard.  Part of my recovery program requires you to take an inventory of your life and various mistakes you've made or experiences you've had.  As you do this, you begin to see mistakes that you've made, and people you've hurt or manipulated.  Later on in the program you ask for forgiveness from some of those people- that step scares me to death (I'm not quite there yet.. but soon).  But the video and blog referenced above have brought so much hope to me and so much peace about that step. It makes me know that no matter how others react, my Savior and Heavenly Father will still be there and still love me.  
• Something I've learned from this program is that "This life is all about receiving what we don't deserve." I definitely don't deserve to be forgiven of some of my sins- but I am so so grateful for the Lord making it possible for me to be COMPLETELY forgiven. 

 I'm so incredibly grateful for the atonement and for what it means in my life.  It means more than I can even tell you.  It means more to me than ANY other gift I've been given.  I'm grateful for my Savior and that he would "descend from his throne divine to rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine.  That he should extend his great love unto such as I, Sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify." I don't know what I would do without this beautiful gift- it is so calming and peaceful to know that it can all be okay again.  :)

A Certain Elder!

Today I'm grateful for guy friends who worthily use the priesthood.  In particular I'm grateful for a certain Elder in Pennsylvania. 

I got a letter today!  At least that's what I thought It was till I opened it and found out that it was some pictures!  I love letters, but I LOVE pictures more!  What a studly looking man!!! I hope someday to marry someone like him.  This dear friend of mine has given me hope for the male race.  I'm so grateful for our friendship, he has helped me through some of the hardest times in life.  He's never judged me for the things I've done.  He loved me when I didn't think it was possible for anyone to love me- especially when I couldn't love myself!  I love this kid a lot!  He's awesome!  I can't even tell you how grateful I am that I gave him another chance. 

Today, I'm grateful that he's doing what he's supposed to be doing and that he's doing it worthily.  I see the Elders here at college so often on campus and when I do it makes me think of three certain elders.  It makes me hope that they're being taken care of as well out there as the elders are here. 

{Calm}

Today I'm grateful for the calm that comes from doing what you know to be right. 

Up until a month ago I was planning on serving an LDS mission- after a while I found that it wasn't what I was supposed to be doing.  I found that I'm supposed to go on with my education. 

Today I met with an adviser for the school I'm planning on attending in the fall.  It is so nice to know, from the peace that I feel, that I'm doing the right thing with my life.  My Heavenly Father has definitely been watching out for me and taking care of me. 

It's amazing to see how often I see his hand in my life and I'm so grateful for that!